1. The couple
must be committed to working together, as their ties
to
their children are stronger and longer, than their
ties to each other...
Building a relationship with step
children is like navigating uncharted
seas. You have to go with the
current and your compass doesn't work. Without the
guidance of an experienced
navigator, you can neither reach your destination
nor get back to port We have extensive
expertise in navigating these seas. There's no
need for you to hit the reef. or drift with the
current.
2. Your role is undefined. It's up
to you to create it, and to do
that you
need to understand where and how you add value to
your stepfamily.
Most people in stepfamilies say they never imagined it
would be so difficult. They feel confused and find
it challenging to remain rational because they are
using systems that work well in biological families,
but don't work at all in stepfamilies. This leads to
feelings of hurt, frustration and failure.
What's special
about how we
address these issues?
Traditional therapy and coaching are based on biological
family perspectives which are not "in-step." Our experience in the stepfamily
"trenches" plus extensive specialty training gives
us a deep
understanding of the entire "step universe." Our
structured approach addresses the specific areas
requiring attention—from
the parents and
the children's' perspectives.
We are committed to taking
the "wicked" out of stepfamilies
by supporting
▪ Parents Contemplating Divorce ▪ Divorced Co-parents
▪ Parents Planning to Remarry
▪ Current Stepparents
▪ Extended Family Members
▪ Adult Stepchildren |
|
|
What Makes Stepfamilies Unique?
Parents
must understand is that ALL
stepfamilies are created from
situation of loss, be it divorce
or death.
A first marriage is made up of
dreams and expectations, and
even though you may have chosen
to leave, by doing so you lose
those dreams.
The children have NO choice in
the matter and have lost their
dreams too. They need to be
reassured that their parent is
not replacing THEM, especially
when a new partner is bringing
children into the "family."
The children will act out and
they will take out their anger
on those who are the least
important/most threatening to
them: the step parent and step
siblings.
Have the same compassion for
their behaviour and perspectives
that you would for anyone
recently bereaved.
It is challenging to remember
their loss amidst the excitement
and hope of a new marriage, but
as the parent, you must take the
lead.
Contact
us to learn more
|
|
|